3 o'clock

somehow i always find myself at 3 o'clock in the morning listening to my favourite tunes, pondering about the mysteries of life.

it's like i'm waiting on a daydream to take me through the morning, and put me in my coffee break where I can have a sandwich and just remember...

those unforgettable memories, the people, the places.

and as i look on my table, there's today's edition of the Daily Illini, which is the campus paper here. can you tell who's on the front cover?


how about a close-up.


and then it's just me and my music, for the rest of the morning, and the rest of the afternoon, and the rest of my life.

another exam tomorrow, another day, another challenge, and the deafening silence as i roam the hallways searching for some answers.


'it all seem so damn hard'

'i should just go to bed '

'nope, trudge on'

yes. trudge on. somebody's got to do the impossible. how would you know if you never gave it a shot.


+listening to: millworker by eddie vedder

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take the dive

so far it's been all work and play.

the typical weekly schedule consists of a healthy diet of midweek procrastination followed by a mad-rush to turn in assignments before heading for a weekend of amnesia and nonsensical fun, or sometimes just doing nothing.

come to think of it, it's saturday again. and i was supposed to go paintballing with a bunch of people. but this time, for some reason i decided to take a pass on it. not because i've suddenly become lazy or anti-social, but i think i needed a breather from the normal routines of day to day life.

down here at the house of paign (as champaign is sometimes affectionately known as), there's really nothing much to do. yes you can say that the campus is HUGE, but outside of campus, there isn't a whole lot worthy to note. it's just corn, corn and more corn. so people here have developed a high level of tolerance for boredom, and you can just about find anything you want to do on campus to entertain yourself. of course the lazy ones just go out and get wasted and joyously pretend they're not in champaign for a day. but... to each of his own right?

and this last week, i attended a SIFE (Students In Free Enterprise) meeting. it's an international organisation of students, academic and business leaders committed to create a better world with better leaders.

essentially SIFE works in partnership with business and higher education, mobilizing university students around the world to use the knowledge gained in the classroom to address real world business and economic issues in their communities. SIFE students form teams on their university campuses and develop outreach projects that teach market economics, entrepreneurship, financial literacy, personal success skills, and business ethics.

it really changed the way i looked at this whole college experience. i used to think the goal of coming here was to just be done with it and getting a awesome job. but i think now that i want to do a little more. i know that one man can't change the world, but waiting on the world to change may not be that much of a better solution either.

so bit by bit, inch by inch, those bits and inches are going to add up to something big, and hopefully beneficial to the society at large.


+listening to: that's the spirit by tommy emmanuel

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the new and improved 359

... but not necessarily cleaner or neater.

home of the blackness. btw check out the ladies at top left ;)

heap of mess

lately i've been doing a bit of a cleaning up, and generally trying to make my dwelling for the rest of the year more habitable. moving into an apartment next year, hell yea!


+listening to: working man by rush

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colours of fall

i love the fall

oldest experimental cornfield in the west

altgeld hall - math building

alma mater

granger engineering library

engineering hall

engineering quad

japan house

do not disturb gravel

curtis orchard pumpkin patch

+listening to: say by john mayer

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that illusive try line

it's almost 3 in the morning.

just got back from a day of senseless fun. enjoyed it while it last, feeling empty.

essay - not started
pre-lab - untouched
machine problem - stuck
math homework - don't wanna think about it
exams - in a weeks time

didn't get any work done for the weekend. but aren't we supposed to enjoy our weekends. i need time to think, to reflect, to ponder and not just to do everything frantically.

homecoming weekend didn't turn out to be as good as i thought. we lost at home to minnesota, which was pretty bad. the clock literally had 10 seconds to go, and we had one shot at getting the touch down that would level the score.

i think what i am afraid of is losing my grasp on that last opportunity, because many times in life you only get one shot. i know what loss and defeat feels like - it's bitter and putrid. that's why i've always strived to land that touch down, to taste victory.

but so far that try line has been illusive. i feel alone, like one versus fifteen.

i don't know if i'll eventually get there. that's what i have to find out for myself. but one thing is certain - when i do finally get over the try line, i'll act like i've been there before.


+listening to: red mosquito by pearl jam

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hmm... interesting

check it out:



i love how they did the one captioned "at the office", with one hand on the phone. ROFL. rite.


and on a completely unrelated note, something interesting also happened during math today

*in the middle of the lecture*

professor: "... and the blue line represents the direction of L1 mapped from Rn to Rm, and the orange line represents the direction of L2 mapped from Rn to Rm, and that should be it."

student A: "sir, the orange line is wrong'

professor: ''er... nope it is... absolutely CORRECT... unless you're colourblind."

student B (at back of class): "don't make fun of colourblind people."

professor: "i'm irish, i can make fun of whoever i like."

*lecture goes on for 5 min*

professor: "and the vector p should point in this direction... oop hold on a minute, i got my directions mixed up."

student B (mutters): "irish fucks can't tell left from right!"

*small commotion*

professor: "what was that? if you are trying to say something funny, you should speak up."

student B: ''irish people can't tell their left from right."

professor: "eh... that's not what you said a moment ago. unless i'm drunk."

*lecture hall burst into spontaneous laughter*
*lecture continues*

+listening to: make you feel better by red hot chili peppers

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murmur of the heart

.

.

.

+listening to: lines in the sand by dream theater

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couple of things you should know

have you ever paid any attention to the people who made those cardboard boxes for all your pizza deliveries?

i think it's time you did. they're obviously trying to send a message.

like this one:

and this one:

i think pretty soon they'll start to predict what the future might hold, out of total and absolute boredom. it's either that or they're really smashed.

which brings me to the next point of this post.

which is...

very importantly...

know thy drinks.

+listening to: millworker by james taylor

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Lobster Nite!!!

omg lobster night at the dining hall. i might have shat myself while eating the lobsters. it's orgasmic...

even bibs for eating lobsters are provided!

new england clam bake!

angry angry lobster

the juicy, succulent, irresistible

the galore

the aftermath xD

+listening to: the sound of fire alarm

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Fall

fall arrived in the most flamboyant of fashions. unlike the subtlety of spring, which creeps in on you and keeps you guessing with anticipation, fall is unpretentious, almost to the point of bluntness.

as i woke up today, it was freezing outside. the weather widget on my computer says it's 3 degrees celcius out. the usually welcoming morning air suddenly turned painfully piercing, and for the first time as far as i could remember, i turned the tap in the bathroom sink towards the "warm" side.

the colours seem to have produced the starkest of contrast overnight. wilted foliage and the broken twigs and branches on the floor made the walk to the morning class that much more scenic. the flaming maple leaves and those that refused to shed their shades of green serve as a constant reminder that fall is still very much a work in progress, on a grand scale.

the lazy sunlight renders blotches of light, dark, light, dark all over campustown like a shadow puppeteer. traversing through the quad thus presented some of the most interesting challenges: keeping yourself in the warm and fuzzy sunshine while picking the shortest route to get to the other side in this freezing weather.

the quad squirrels seemed much more restrained, just foraging around an occasional tree looking for fallen pine nuts and whatever they can find i suppose; for once they're not chasing each other frantically around the place.

steaming breaths, hands in pockets, hooded sweaters; and then there's the odd rebel or two still in bermudas and t-shirt. the rosy cheeks of those on bycicles trying to fight the windchill, and the looks of discomfort on the faces of those who decided to brave the sardine-packed campus shuttle - it is as much about the change of seasons as it is about the people.

a fistful of colours, splashed onto the 50 or so acres of stunning backdrop. so ends september, fall comes knocking.


+listening to: wake me up when september ends by green day

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