finally free

I AM DONE WITH EXAMS
I AM DONE WITH EXAMS
I AM DONE WITH EXAMS
I AM DONE WITH EXAMS
I AM DO...

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+listening to: america fuck yea

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take the dive

so far it's been all work and play.

the typical weekly schedule consists of a healthy diet of midweek procrastination followed by a mad-rush to turn in assignments before heading for a weekend of amnesia and nonsensical fun, or sometimes just doing nothing.

come to think of it, it's saturday again. and i was supposed to go paintballing with a bunch of people. but this time, for some reason i decided to take a pass on it. not because i've suddenly become lazy or anti-social, but i think i needed a breather from the normal routines of day to day life.

down here at the house of paign (as champaign is sometimes affectionately known as), there's really nothing much to do. yes you can say that the campus is HUGE, but outside of campus, there isn't a whole lot worthy to note. it's just corn, corn and more corn. so people here have developed a high level of tolerance for boredom, and you can just about find anything you want to do on campus to entertain yourself. of course the lazy ones just go out and get wasted and joyously pretend they're not in champaign for a day. but... to each of his own right?

and this last week, i attended a SIFE (Students In Free Enterprise) meeting. it's an international organisation of students, academic and business leaders committed to create a better world with better leaders.

essentially SIFE works in partnership with business and higher education, mobilizing university students around the world to use the knowledge gained in the classroom to address real world business and economic issues in their communities. SIFE students form teams on their university campuses and develop outreach projects that teach market economics, entrepreneurship, financial literacy, personal success skills, and business ethics.

it really changed the way i looked at this whole college experience. i used to think the goal of coming here was to just be done with it and getting a awesome job. but i think now that i want to do a little more. i know that one man can't change the world, but waiting on the world to change may not be that much of a better solution either.

so bit by bit, inch by inch, those bits and inches are going to add up to something big, and hopefully beneficial to the society at large.


+listening to: that's the spirit by tommy emmanuel

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24

it's about 24 hours to doomsday - the third of my four mid-terms this time round. the thought of the already irreversibly marooned math exam on monday does little to boost my self esteem.

these few days have been... awkward.

awkward behaviors, awkward schedules, awkward decisions to make, awkward situations to endure.

the usual cheeriness in me are all gone, and to be honest some might even consider certain behaviors to be anti-social. i just feel so tired everyday after classes that i barely have time to do things that i enjoy. and this is only my freshmen year. people have always told me that u of i's electrical engineering program is rigorous, i guess this is what rigorous means.

thank god for gen ed classes, they provide the briefest of respites from the mundane, facts-laden technical courses. and the funny thing is i actually look forward to doing my CINE 104 (a film class) homework. it sometimes makes me wonder if i've chosen the right major.

it's not that i hate engineering, but i really envy the people in my classes who are always in the front row, who listen to the professors speak as if god himself were delivering a message. it's that thirst for knowledge that i'm envious of, and of course that intrinsic understanding of the subject that seem to come so naturally to them.

i yearn to be in that group of the select few, who were there for the sole reason of wanting to be there and nowhere else. and the worst part is that i know i would never be able to be the best at what i do if that huge void is not filled by something as absolute as passion.

i wanna feel alive again, i wanna feel like the way i feel every time i step onto the rugby pitch, every second of my life. what's my calling in life?


+listening to: gravity by john mayer trio

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creases

exams, exams, exams
gotta iron out those creases



+listening to: nothing

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Game Day

the first home game of the season (american football that is)!

i woke up to the sound of the marching illini practising downstairs at 7am in the morning. that's one of the perks of living right next to the football stadium - you get a free morning call in the form of the band before every home game.

but the thing is, you see there was this party last night, and um, i kinda passed out. so right after the "morning call" i went straight back to sleep and got up right before the game started.

since i couldn't get a ticket (they were sold out before school even started), i had to watch in on tv. since college football is such a big thing here, you can catch almost every game live on tv. even espn broadcasts them.

as usual we whooped eastern illinois, and the funny thing is the live feed had a little bit of a lag time, so i was sort of hearing echoes of everything commentator was saying, and when i went to the toilet, i didn't miss a thing! it was like listen to the tv without the picture, and everytime we scored a touch down, a cannon shot was fired. it was so freaking loud.

my head still hurts, so this post shall end here. i've learnt my lesson: jager bombs are killer, and please drink responsibly.




+listening to: my wife by the who

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[DON'T] get it started...

learning and going to class can be fun, to a certain extent.

definition: a certain extent, below the threshold or the limit.

a week has almost gone by, and the classes are getting crazier and crazier. other than my math class, my intro to engineering class and intro to computing systems class are becoming increasingly unfathomable.

but then again that's because i'm probably lagging behind in readings. which is where the 3-day labour day weekend comes in this week, 2 of which will be spent in chicago, and i guess that leaves me with the whole of monday to play catch up. how very fun.









+listening to: dani california by red hot chili peppers

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first day of class

the fall semester has official begun. and with it came the change of seasons. a perfectly sunny morning outside was a freezing 13 degrees C, and there i was walking to class with my ass frozen wearing a t-shirt and bermudas. smart choice.

the three-hour ECE110 lab got canceled much to my relief, so i had literally nothing to do till 2 pm. that was also when the fun started, with 2 highly entertaining lectures and then followed by a meet-n-greet/barbeque at the engineering quad.

by the time the barbeque concluded, it was 6.30 pm but that wasn't the end of the day yet. there was one more finale to the day: English 104 - introduction to film.

it was one of the electives which i desperately wanted to get into, and i'm really glad i got a spot in the class. today was also the inaugural weekly screening session, where we enjoyed the film north by northwest directed by alfred hitchcock. it was definitley a breath of fresh air from all the techincally challenging engineering and math courses and i can really see myself looking forward to every monday instead of dreading it.

i've been thinking about a challenge that someone's posted recently: go to bed every night feeling exhausted.

it's not about being tired all day and feeling sleepy. it's about having spent your day with a purpose, knowing that you have put your heart and soul into however short amount of time you have, going to bed knowing that you'll be fully recharged when you open your eyes again, and doing the same thing all over again.

and i dare say, today was one of those days that i spent with a purpose in mind, where i paid attention to every single word the lecturers had to say, and i opened my eyes and mind to everything around me and took it all in.

today i feel exhausted.


+listening to: bold as love by jimi hendrix

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sweet 200

wow, this is my 200th post already. let's make it an eye candy =)

one of the many bookstores on campus

one of the many shops surrounding the union

diagonal pedestrian crossing, you don't have to cross twice!

this is the uh... i don't know what this is.

another one i don't know

sorority <3

kappa kappa... wha?

frat party... yall

the underground, undergrad libarary

agricultural something...

school of something

the picnic ground on campus

the cemetery, yep on campus too

soft-serve with tonnes of condiments, i could have nothing but this for lunch everyday O.O

i was really full, like REALLY FULL

there is always room for desert after dinner

i have no idea what these are

make your own taco!

salads i think

coffee or tea, or something else

what kinda cereal you want for breakfast?

random shot at the basement pantry of the undergrad library

+listening to: us and them by dream theater

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safe and sound... and kicking

finally had a breather since all the madness that ensued after the safe touch down on sunday, or monday if you are in the GMT +8 time zone. the flight and the bus ride was killer though, it's like right after a 15 hr flight and then straight to a 3 and a half hour bus ride to school. urgh.

first impressions are definitely a-okay, the food is awesome, but i suspect i'll get sick of it at some point. it's all about being bigger, faster, stronger and better over here. you see that in every facet of life.

b&j at the airport before i leave...

pizza by the slice at antonio's

random bus stop

my crib lookin in from the door

reverse angle

the view from my crib

+listening to: the sound of wind rushing through the window

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pre-departure, stand in black

woohoo! i'm still high from the pre-departure briefing for uni. kudos to the UIUC singapore students association for organising this event. it was completely the opposite of what i had in mind. the venue where it was held was also a really SUPERB and cozy lounge like place in raffles tower with a SPLENDID view. i just wish i lived there.

the briefing itself took up about an hour with some really helpful info and experiences from current seniors but what i really enjoyed was the lunch afterwards and mingling with all those really cool people. it's such a diverse group too with exchange students and freshmen mixed together but i mostly stuck to the freshmen group.

got to know some people from school who are going to UIUC as well, and i was quite shocked to see some familiar faces! that aside i just felt completely at home for some reason and made some funky new friends. stayed afterwards all the way till 2-ish chatting with the seniors and i'm really looking forward to college now!

and on a scintillating side-note, the men in black beat england in the most definitive of fashions. final score 37 - 20 to the all blacks. this ought to shut all the critics and cynics up for whatever reasons. they've demonstrated today that they're still a force to be reckoned with. and my man for today's test was ma'a nonu.


he's the most divine combination power, pace and skill for an inside center. it's the holy trinity of the perfect qualities coming together as one. the savagery slashing steps, the brute strength and the most exquisite handling abilities, it doesn't get any better than that. it's like seeing a young tana umaga but twice as brutal!

ok, off to watch the springboks cane wales again...


+listening to: aces high by iron maiden

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lost in transit

Image via Wikipediaheadache, headache.

what i thought was a no-brainer task turned out to be a true pain in the ass. i have a habit of doing that. hmm.

it's that time of year before college starts where one starts to make the final preparations. so i jostled my lazy ass into actually doing something useful on the computer for once - booking my flight to chicago.

now after looking at several online travel agent, i realized that getting the time of arrival to suit my needs is a monumental challenge. most flights arrive in the afternoon (local chicago time) and by the time i get off the bus from the airport to the school, it would have been pretty late in the evening. and that poses huge logistical problems concerning accommodation, food, and reporting to the international students office.

and when i do find several flights that arrive pretty early in the morning, they are either from unknown airlines (jet air anyone? no?) or present the passengers with a rather generous and leisurely transit time of... 12 FREAKING HOURS.

what the hell on earth am i supposed to do with 12 hours stuck at some miserable airport? rewrite the history of human civilization? ludicrous.

so i guess it really leaves me with no other options than keep looking. crying mommy isn't really a viable option now that i've grown up. hopefully this time i can do something right, even though it might seem like the easiest thing in the world - hauling your own ass to school.


and i'm fully looking forward to tomorrow: that adrenaline rush even before getting off the bus, that smell of fresh morning dew on the pitch, that place where it all began, awaits,

One Last Time

...
The biggest regret in my life,
I've let my love go
...

+listening to: honor thy father by dream theater

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choices

why are there so many choices in life that we have to make?

humans are obsessed with customization. gone are the days of the ford model-t where "you can have it in any colour you want as long as it's black".

i'm staring at the course work list that i just got in the mail for my electrical engineering major. it's about 20 pages long, printed in size 3 font. to add the icing on the cake, the associate head for undergraduate programs signed off the letter with "happy reading through this material".

the only thing i'm gonna be happy about by the time i finish it is the fact that i would have lost total sensation in my eyelids and that my eyeballs would have gone septic. also, all my hair would have fallen out and i would probably need a completely brand new set of dentures too. good golly i must really be looking forward to reading it.


looking on the bright side, i've finally watched There Will Be Blood! oh my, oh my it was good. i've always known it would be a really awesome film but i just didn't have the time to watch it when it came out because, well i was too busy mugging for my a levels to even remember to eat, let alone watch a movie.

the landscape was bleak, and i don't know what kind of filters they used on the cameras or what type of medium they filmed it on but boy it sured looked like one of those classic 70s westerns. it's got that rustic vibe and that hard edge. the oil boom of the early 1900s as told through the relationships between a loving father and an adopted son, between a psychotic tycoon and a pseudo priest was a brilliant plot. it was like going back in time. and maybe there's a hint of parallelism to the modern-day america? oil and religion, anyone?

the soundtrack was kind of an acquired taste, and i did get cheesed out by the ending a bit: the over-acting plus the overly artificial symbolism with the pool of blood. but other than that it was very, VERY cool. both emotionally and visually.

the director paul anderson has outdone himself once again by breaking all the rules of coherence. after his previous engagements like Magnolia, which (in my humble opinion) was both INSANELY good and revolutionary, you'd think he'd toned down a bit, but... no. and daniel day-lewis? what can i say. he is mind-boggling. it just reminded me of his performance as "the butcher" in Gangs of New York. probably my favourite character in that film too.

and i particularly like the quote by lord byron from which the title was taken: "the king-times are fast finishing, there will be blood shed like water, and tears like mist. but the peoples will conquer in the end. i shall not live to see it, but i foresee it."

films like this are the sechs yo! how can you not love the movies?


+listening to: lullaby by david roth

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all the world at my fingertips

i've got so many things laid out in front of my eyes that erm, honestly i don't know what to do next. the emails kept coming with subject headings such as "...action required", "selection needed for...", "...important coursework info", etc.

it's a little too overwhelming, and the fact that i was informed today of my residential hall assignment for uni does not provide any relief at all. you see, i was assigned to snyder hall, one of the "six-packs", also renowned for being "party" halls. well i guess i can only blame myself, because it was the only substance-free (read: good boy) hall on offer. apparently you cannot be intoxicated while you're staying there or you'll get kicked out. i guess i'll just have to crash somewhere else on those really plastered-to-the-wall days.

the morning session was pretty sweet. the boys actually showed up before i did and it was a bit more relaxed with more focus on individual skills. and one particular team drill at the end made me glad to see how far they've come since the end of the season. i'd like to think part of the credit goes to me, but honestly i couldn't even possibly begin. because i saw something that i haven't seen in a while - that unmistakable sheen in some of their eyes, that glitter, and maybe signs of that desire. i know to some of them, this game really means a lot and that they truly love it. i know.

i desperately want to watch a good movie tonight to let off some steam, but i'm terribly undecided on which one. hmm... time to make a decision...

There Will Be Blood it is.



+listening to: central park west - your lady by jeff richman

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