it has indeed been a long week. claiming that i'm dead tired would actually be an understatement at this point. i think it's got something to do with the fact that in the past 72 hours of my life, only 6 have been spent on sleeping.
the drudgery of life is finally getting to me. i don't think i'm one of those winter persons. because gloomy weather pisses me off. and i sometimes lose myself when i'm not feeling my most comfortable self.
it's been a week spent doing work in vain. karma never seem to reward me for doing something good. i did my math homework till 2.30 in the morning yesterday, and karma just slapped me in the face by making me oversleep this morning and miss class completely, and hence i never even got a chance to turn in my homework.
this week is forgettable. i don't think i have been through a week as bad as this one. but thankfully, there's the thanksgiving break to look forward to starting this weekend. but i'm not too glad though, because that's when the battle starts all over again. there's the finals after that, and a shitload of stuff to do in between.
i'm trying to do the best i can, honestly.
+listening to: slow dancing in a burning room by john mayer
Thursday, November 20
| it's been a long week |  |
Sunday, November 16
| cold... | |
it's been a long time since i have been here. truthfully, there was nothing inspirational or worthy of being talked about.
this past week has been everything but nice. it's rainy, wet, dreadful, gloomy. the days grew shorter, the sun is getting lazier, and it doesn't help at all that it's getting pretty freezing out there.
just take a look at the weather outlook for the next few days, and winter hasn't even started yet. and don't be fooled by the deceitful looking sunny/cloudy symbol. the sunny bit is pure BS. you pretty much never get to see the sun.
it's going to be thanksgiving soon, in about 2 weeks. even though i've never celebrated one with my family (usually my mom goes to church), the spirit of the holiday season is surely getting to me.
chi-town for thanksgiving, here i come. but before that, 2 exams tomorrow. let there be mercy.
+listening to: jerry lee lewis by jerry lee lewis
Sunday, November 9
| hanging in the balance | |
it's another peaceful saturday night, or should i say sunday morning.
i watched into the wild for the 2nd time today with a couple of friends because the office downstairs just happened to have it in their dvd collection. it was definitely a different experience watching it with other people, and we had the lights off, and everyone sort of just took it all in.
it was also nice to have someone like natasha in the room, because she grew up in alaska, and has actually seen the magic bus in real life as depicted in the movie. somehow there was a sense of closeness that i haven't felt before when i watched it for the first time. maybe it's just the sudden epiphany about the reality, that somehow it actually did occur.
hollywood tend to have that negative dramatic effect on you. somehow at the back of your mind, even though your subconscious may have been mostly fooled, you know that the story was made up. but not this time though.
and this time round, the ending didn't make me as sad as compared to the first time. it actually felt kind of sweet. i guess wisdom comes to knowing why and how things occur the way they do once you've experienced them, maybe i have indeed grown wiser.
if mccandless hasn't died the way he did, had he come out of that alive, he would never have gotten the insight into what the whole truth is. he could have lived his whole life not knowing what he knew right at the end...
that beyond all selfish needs, and whatever satisfaction he got from doing what he wanted to do and who he wanted to be, HAPPINESS IS ONLY REAL WHEN SHARED.
+listening to: society by eddie vedder
Tuesday, November 4
| election day | |
"go barack go!... what do you say america?..."
the words echoed through the hallway as james and brian from down the hall made their rounds apparently gloating about the positive projections in favor of barack obama. cnn is calling it 174 to 64 right now along with a democrats majority in the senate.
it's just a little past 8pm here in obama's home state of illinois, and polls have officially closed. as i headed to dinner over an hour ago, there were still people streaming into the polling station set up at the main lounge, all looking eager to cast their ballot.
it has definitely been an eye opening experience, as i talked to friends who were eligible to participate in this historic occasion. the political apathy that i thought was so prevalent among the young people here somehow has not reared its ugly head as far as i see. then again, i can't be sure though, because the scope of my knowledge is limited to the circle of people i know.
still it was somehow satisfying to know that EDUCATED voters are going out to make INFORMED choices en masse today, especially people of my generation. these are the same people who will be the deciding factor in the decades of contests to come.
it's going to be hard to go to sleep tonight. america is awake and alert. the way i see it whoever wins doesn't really matter a whole lot. the most crucial issue is that people go out and make that decision for themselves and not let others do it for them.. isn't that the whole point of a free, democratic country? rock the vote -- change or no change.
ask not what you can do for your country, ask what your country is doing to you.
+listening to: help help by pearl jam
Saturday, November 1
| it's hahahalloween | |
it's that one time of the year where you can be just about WHOEVER you want, and no one will ever laugh at you, only because everyone else's costumes are just as ridiculous. but it's all good fun, despite being a tad silly.
notable costumes (not in order or funny-ness):
- ghostbuster
- a group of people chasing each other in the streets wearing pac man character costumes
- beer pong table
- michael phelps
- joe the plumber
and so here it goes:
in case you haven't been able to tell, i was derek smalls, the bassist from spinal tap. if you have not seen the movie, you're retarded. so go look up THIS IS SPINAL TAP.
until next time. i'm so stoned.
+listening to: the jaguar by frank gambale
Thursday, October 30
| 3 o'clock | |
somehow i always find myself at 3 o'clock in the morning listening to my favourite tunes, pondering about the mysteries of life.
it's like i'm waiting on a daydream to take me through the morning, and put me in my coffee break where I can have a sandwich and just remember...
those unforgettable memories, the people, the places.
and as i look on my table, there's today's edition of the Daily Illini, which is the campus paper here. can you tell who's on the front cover?
how about a close-up.
and then it's just me and my music, for the rest of the morning, and the rest of the afternoon, and the rest of my life.
another exam tomorrow, another day, another challenge, and the deafening silence as i roam the hallways searching for some answers.
'it all seem so damn hard'
yes. trudge on. somebody's got to do the impossible. how would you know if you never gave it a shot.
+listening to: millworker by eddie vedder
Saturday, October 25
| take the dive | |
so far it's been all work and play.
the typical weekly schedule consists of a healthy diet of midweek procrastination followed by a mad-rush to turn in assignments before heading for a weekend of amnesia and nonsensical fun, or sometimes just doing nothing.
come to think of it, it's saturday again. and i was supposed to go paintballing with a bunch of people. but this time, for some reason i decided to take a pass on it. not because i've suddenly become lazy or anti-social, but i think i needed a breather from the normal routines of day to day life.
down here at the house of paign (as champaign is sometimes affectionately known as), there's really nothing much to do. yes you can say that the campus is HUGE, but outside of campus, there isn't a whole lot worthy to note. it's just corn, corn and more corn. so people here have developed a high level of tolerance for boredom, and you can just about find anything you want to do on campus to entertain yourself. of course the lazy ones just go out and get wasted and joyously pretend they're not in champaign for a day. but... to each of his own right?
and this last week, i attended a SIFE (Students In Free Enterprise) meeting. it's an international organisation of students, academic and business leaders committed to create a better world with better leaders.
essentially SIFE works in partnership with business and higher education, mobilizing university students around the world to use the knowledge gained in the classroom to address real world business and economic issues in their communities. SIFE students form teams on their university campuses and develop outreach projects that teach market economics, entrepreneurship, financial literacy, personal success skills, and business ethics.
it really changed the way i looked at this whole college experience. i used to think the goal of coming here was to just be done with it and getting a awesome job. but i think now that i want to do a little more. i know that one man can't change the world, but waiting on the world to change may not be that much of a better solution either.
so bit by bit, inch by inch, those bits and inches are going to add up to something big, and hopefully beneficial to the society at large.
+listening to: that's the spirit by tommy emmanuel
